The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Tristram reiterates his plan: He will write “two volumes every year” as long as his mind and body allow him to do so (385). Though his spirit remains strong, his health is suffering. He may not finish his project. He has so much to write and so much to say, he explains, and no one can write his story but himself. This desire motivates him to keep moving. He plans a trip to Europe and begins his new narrative when he is in Dover, about to set off for a tour of the continent.

The sea is rough and makes Tristram feel “sick as a horse” (386), but he arrives in the French port of Calais. Many travel writers have described Calais, he says, so he need not go into detail. When he does attempt to describe parts of the town and its history, he comes dangerously close to becoming sidetracked again. When he realizes he is nearly reproducing the 50-page long account of the siege of the town in 1346 written by Rapin, he stops himself.

Tristram travels from Calais to Boulogne and complains that French transport is always unreliable. He reaches Montreuil, where he meets an innkeeper’s daughter named Janatone. He praises her beauty. However, he still feels as though he is being chased by the specter of Death, so he continues his journey. He stops in Abbeville, where he does not like his accommodation. Determined to reach Paris, Tristram complains that he cannot sleep in a stagecoach. The “incessant” changing of the horses means that he must wake up every six miles to pay more.

Tristram reaches Paris. After surveying the streets of the city, he complains about trying to find a hotel. He apologizes to the reader, as he cannot stay in Paris very long. Instead, he resumes his journey. Tristram dislikes the slow speed of his journey. Mentioning the best ways to make a French horse move, Tristram begins an anecdote. In his story about an abbess who is unwilling to swear, he uses many benign French words that sound almost like “horrid” English words (408). Tristram travels through a series of French towns and describes them in short order. He passes through Fontainebleau, Sens, Joigny, and Auxerre. In his youth, he explains, he took a similar journey to Europe. He and his family (except Elizabeth) visited many of these same destinations. When Tristram remembers the trip, he thinks of his father’s eccentric behavior. He shares a few anecdotes, and, after doing so, he is surprised about how his narrative has begun to overlap with itself. His memories of Europe intermingle with his contemporary journey across the continent.

As they enter Lyon, Tristram must sell his coach. The journey has worn it out so much that it is nearly unusable. Tristram encounters a string of annoyances in Lyon. He feeds a macaroon to an ass that he names Honesty, but someone drives the ass away, and it rips Tristram’s trousers. Next, he learns that he must pay a large fee to travel to Avignon. Even when he claims that he will travel by boat, he is told that he must still pay the fee. He eventually gives up on arguing and tries to joke his way out of the situation. Though he pays the fee, he comes away feeling satisfied. As he is leaving, however, he realizes that he has left his important notes in the carriage. He rushes back, only to find that the wittiest notes have been curled up almost beyond repair. Tristram takes them away, promising to salvage what he can. Eventually, he reaches the south of France, where he finally feels as though he has escaped Death. On the back of a mule, he crosses the Languedoc plains. Such environments are terrible for travelers and travel writers, he says, as there is nothing to describe. Tristram devises a Plain Story, promising that he will write more such stories in the future. Right now, he remembers that he promised to tell the story of Toby’s romance with Widow Wadman. As he rides, he remembers a village maid named Nanette with whom he once shared a dance. He wishes that every day of his life could be as pleasant as the evening he spent dancing with the “sun-burnt daughter of Labour” (431).