The Art of Love

Ovid

Fiction | Novel/Book in Verse | Adult | Published in 2

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Themes

How to Find, Catch, and Keep a Woman

The first two books of The Art of Love are dedicated to helping inexperienced, poor but educated, heterosexual men with their romantic pursuits. First, a man must “learn the spots that damsels most frequent” (Book 1, Line 50) to find a romantic partner. Ovid’s discussions of locations in Rome characterize it as urban, culturally rich, and full of leisure and recreational opportunities. After locating a potential partner in the theater or racetrack, a man must woo her. Ovid assures his male readers that “all women can be won” (Book 1, Line 269). With the right tactics, a man can convince just about any woman to consent.

One of the reasons Ovid’s advice reads as modern to contemporary readers is his practical and specific suggestions—rather than only waxing poetic about the vague emotional demands of love, he offers detailed and applicable instructions to his audience. One striking example is his lengthy exploration of proper personal hygiene and grooming—a section of the book that implies that men are often quite flawed in their self-presentation and have room for improvement. While “Man’s beauty needs no varnish” (Book 1, Line 509), men should be clean and well-kept and pay attention to their clothing and accessories.

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The behavior and manners of those aspiring to woo needs to be addressed as well. Maintaining a relationship requires being pleasant, urbane, and entertaining: “For love, it’s charm you need” (Book 2, Line 107). Being charming means flattering and agreeing with the woman you are seeing—you should “praise” (Book 2, Line 298) her. It also means you should “[s]ubmit and suffer” (Book 2, Line 178) to her wishes rather than dictating where you go and what you do on your dates. Thus, a large part of charm is emotional intelligence and intellect: “Let Beauty rest on Mind’s foundation sure” (Book 2, Line 119) by developing your mind through reading. These traits will last, while beauty fades.

On the other hand, much of what Ovid writes relies on sexist stereotype at best and dangerous misinformation at worst. Despite frequent evidence of progressive attitudes toward sex and gender roles, he also recapitulates the casual misogyny of his time. For instance, during courtship, Ovid recommends being assertive, and even physically aggressive in ways that 21st-century readers would interpret as assault. Repeating an outdated and harmful cultural script, he argues that “it’s force that women want” (Book 1, Line 673). Similarly, Ovid recommends using alcohol because “[w]ine lights the fire of passion in the soul” (Book 1, Line 237)—lowered inhibitions allow for greater freedom of action for both pursuer and pursued—an idea we no longer accept, as alcohol prevents the ability to meaningfully consent to a sexual encounter. Finally, he proposes game-playing rather than honesty in relationships. You should introduce or invent a romantic rival to keep your partner interested: “get her used to you” (Book 2, Line 345), then “[g]ive her a rest” (Book 2, Line 351), using withholding to add drama to a romance.

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However, these instructions are undercut by Ovid’s sense of egalitarianism when it comes to sex. He often foregrounds female sexual desire and pleasure in ways that are markedly progressive for his time and out of step with the common conception of women as frigid and sexually passive. He encourages men to learn how to touch their partners in ways that they like and advocates for simultaneous orgasms: “Together reach the goal” (Book 2, Line 727). Even his advice for affairs is in this spirit, as he strongly suggests that both men and women tolerate and forgive infidelity.

Advice for Women

In Book 3, Ovid’s audience switches from lower class men to average-looking women. While some men might object to Ovid instructing women just as he taught men, Ovid claims that Venus herself demanded that he write this part of The Art of Love. In keeping with this spirit of turnabout being fair play, much of Ovid’s advice to women echoes and repeats what he has already told men—an egalitarian and progressive for his time approach that treats men and women as relative equals in relationships.

As the writer of a treatise on grooming, Cosmetics for Ladies, Ovid considers himself an expert on appearance and also uses the opportunity to promote his previous work—one element of the self-referential tone he often adopts. Women who are not conventionally attractive can use makeup, clothing, and hairstyle to seem beautiful: “Looks come by art” (Book 3, Line 105). At the same time, anything that smacks of too much effort is unappealing, so women should hide their beauty products: “All this gives beauty, but it’s ugly viewing” (Book 3, Line 217). The process of creating should be hidden—just as in poetry, so too in cosmetics.

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Appearance isn’t just about the surface—women are not statues, so their physical movements and behavior also matter. Women should learn to control their facial expressions—“it’s vital ugly moods to ban” (Book 3, Line 503)—because some emotions, like rage, can make you look undesirable. Furthermore, you should move gracefully, whether simply out and about or dancing: The way a woman holds her body is “no little part of charm” (Book 3, Line 298). The mind is also an important attribute for sexual appeal; women should be well-read, intellectually stimulating, and develop artistic skills like playing music and writing: No woman “[s]hould lack the art to handle lyre and quill” (Book 3, Line 320). This proposition is also unconventional; women of Ovid’s time were not expected to aspire to scholarly pursuits and no formal schooling for them existed. Ovid’s assumption that his readers would have access to the resources to learn these things points to their elevated class. Just as he was writing for educated, if poor, men, so too is he writing for middle- to upper-class women. As with men, the mind plays an important role in desirability.

Mirroring the previous books, Ovid recommends women use the suggestion of rivalry to keep love alive, since jealousy over a rival will keep men interested. Book 3 also echoes the sexual frankness of Book 2, though Ovid acknowledges that women have been socialized not to prioritize their own pleasure: “What makes you blush concerns us most” (Book 3, Line 770). After again promoting simultaneous orgasm, Book 3 goes into great detail about different sexual positions—though this potentially educative section is somewhat tempered by Ovid’s insistence that women choose the positions that best highlight their physical features, rather than those which bring them the most pleasure.

The Art of Writing

The third theme that runs throughout The Art of Love is a discussion of poetry, love letters, and the idea of being a well-read person. The sections of the work that address this theme tend to be the most self-referential, as any mention of poetry cannot help but make the reader think metafictionally about the poem they are reading. Ovid also uses several digressions to discuss his life as a poet, his grievances with the standing of poets in society, and his conviction that poets make the best lovers—a kind of indirect appeal to women readers to seek him out and experience his skills firsthand.

The creativity involved in romance is deeply linked to the artistry of writing poetry. Ovid argues that women should be avid readers, which would mean that “woman’s heart by eloquence is bowed” (Book 1, Line 462), but which also places the onus on would-be male lovers to produce the good writing that could effectively move a romantic interest. Ovid’s implied example is his own work, which he claims has won over many a woman—making him an expert—and which appeals to a large female audience. Good writing has auditory elements, or “words that charm the ear” (Book 2, Line 159) and should demonstrate the writer’s knowledge of culture. Moreover, men should “Write in a cultured but colloquial way” (Book 3, Line 481), maintaining a conversational tone while demonstrating their intelligence.

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Ovid also speaks about the profession of poetry, and how it affects the people who create it. Published poets have attained a level of immortality—the writer’s words live on after their body dies. For Ovid, there is no higher objective: “What seeks the sacred poet else than fame?” (Book 3, Line 403). At the same time, this ability to ensure life after death makes poets desirable as lovers—inspire one, and his words will allow you to exist in perpetuity. However, being a poet in Rome during Ovid’s lifetime was not always looked upon favorably. He complains that the poet “[w]ho in the Muses’ service wakes and works” (Book 3, Line 412) doesn’t get the kind of respect and honor he deserves; those around him accuse him of being a lazy lay-about who shirks his duty to engage in other pursuits, like war or commerce. Finally, poetry affects the emotional intelligence of those who write it: Poets’ “characters are moulded by our art” (Book 3, Line 540). Poets are generally more sensitive people, and more prone to heartbreak.