37 pages • 1 hour read
I Fell in Love with Hope
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Symbols & Motifs
The Color Yellow
Yellow appears in multiple forms throughout the novel. In the first chapter, Sam describes his love Sam’s eyes as “yellow-flared.” When Hikari approaches the hospital, Sam sees a glimpse of yellow and wonders, “[d]id the sun descend to Earth and decide to spend a day among its subjects” (17). Sam suggests that people cannot see the light that they project, only its reflection. The narrator’s lover Sam and Hikari are mirrors for the narrator’s yellow, his warmth. The narrator Sam embodies people’s hopes and dreams. Where the color yellow appears, so does hope.
Sam
Sam’s function in the novel is multi-faceted. He is the narrator, a personification of the hospital, and most importantly, a symbol. He is, in his own words, “the soul of an unfulfilled wish. I am what arises to keep people afloat when it seems so comfortable to sink” (397). Sam represents the hope and resilience of humanity. He takes physical form in the hospital because he wants to understand why people keep fighting when they continue to lose others. By becoming real and learning to love others whom he will lose, Sam brings hope to all he encounters in the hospital, whether he means to or not.
The Bridge
The bridge is a key place for Sam—it’s where he lost his lover, Sam, and where he almost loses himself and Hikari. Though the bridge is a physical place, it primarily symbolizes the junction between life and death. When one of the characters crosses the bridge, it means that they have died and are no longer part of Sam’s life at the hospital in a literal sense. Sam cannot follow anyone after they cross the bridge: He manifests hopes for the living, and once someone crosses the bridge, hopes for life come to an end. The bridge becomes Sam’s worst fear. He lost one lover to the bridge and fears losing anyone else. Therefore, he isolates and fights his feelings for Hikari.
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